Life not working sucks. I feel like a total loser, like I should be doing things and I am not. I know this is all for my health and I can’t imagine getting up at 5:30 again to go to work, but I still feel like I am worthless. I knew these feelings would hit eventually but I really hoped they would hold off for more than a
h. I’ve been out of work 5 weeks, that’s it. I am just getting into a routine with my meds in my new home. I should not feel like I need to work to show my worth. But alas, I do. mont
I am hoping that once I get all of my stuff up here and I have my exercise videos and ball I will feel better, because then I can exercise. Right now, all I am doing is sleeping until 10-11:30 and then sitting on the sofa till Peter gets home. I do wash and sweep but I haven’t done much else. I just don’t have the energy for it. I can’t tell if it is a mental lack of energy or a physical one. Meaning, am I hitting another low point and will need to ride this out and hope to feel better in a few days or weeks?
And I don’t want anyone who doesn’t work thinking I think they are losers. I don’t and I know this is for my benefit. But I have been working since age 15 so for me not to work is just weird and strange to me. I don’t like it.