I don’t know where to begin. When I am hurting it helps to write so write is what I shall do.
I don’t think it is real. I don’t feel anything. I am sad yes, but it doesn’t seem to have sunk in yet. I haven’t cried. Jenn is gone and I haven’t even cried.
It doesn’t surprise me, I was like that when my step-niece passed. I didn’t cry until the funeral. Then it was real to me. I assume the same will be with Jenn.
I just keep thinking that it is a joke. That someone will come online and say “just kidding”. But I know its true, she really did pass. CF really did take her life away.
I keep seeing her smiling face from all of her pictures. I keep thinking of how I was going to met her in December but got sick and couldn’t. I keep thinking that when I get to meet her in person she won’t be alive.
It’s so sad. I’m so sad. CF sucks. It beats you down and takes the good people away. But it does make you realize how awesome the friends are that you have, and makes you cherish those days with them.
I know this won’t be the last post I write about Jenn. It is the only way I know how to get my thoughts out. So bear with me my dear blog readers and expect more to come in the next few weeks.
Good Bless you Jenn!
On a side note I coughed my voice clear away. It is gone, totally…LOL