Saturday, February 14, 2009

Home from MA (UPDATED WITH PIC)

I am home and I am exhausted.  The services were beautiful.  It was great meeting her parents and sister and Andy.  And of course some of her friends.  It was sad and for some reason hugging her dad made me cry the hardest.  Even now as I write this I am tearing up.  I started crying when I walked in but when it came my turn to introduce myself to him I squeaked out "I'm Amy from CF chat too".  You know those sobs that you feel coming on and you can tell you are just gonna burst at the seam?  That's how I felt, but I didn't.  I bawled but not audibly.  

Even after attending the services it still doesn't seem real.  It still seems like a dream or a joke.  She isn't really gone...not findingJenn.  Not our Jenn.  

I'm trying to put a positive spin on it.  The Lord felt she was needed now.  That she was better served with Him as she was and not in a few years, or 20.  Perhaps he needs her more than we do.  It doesn't feel that way.  I will miss reading her blog updates.  I will miss her in chat.  

All week I have been thinking about a comment she left on my blog.  Here is the post.  I have thought about it over and over since I found out she was in a coma.  It's not her time, but alas I guess it really was....

I have so many more tears inside and I hope I can shed them before long.  

On a positive note.  It was fabulous meeting Talana finally!  I have a picture of us together but since I am so tired I will upload it tomorrow and add it here.

I also have other news to update on but that will wait until Sunday.  I have to write it all out first....



here is the picture of Talana and I outside the Church where the lunch was held after the services.  Jenn's awesome sister took the picture for us.

<3

8 comments:

  1. Glad you got to go. ((Hugs)) for you.

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  2. Amy, glad to hear you made it there and back ok. I'm sure Jenn's family appreciate you and Talana making the trip to pay your respects.

    Kevin

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  3. Aww Amy, I know how heartbreaking that must have been. I'm glad you are home and that you got to go and show her family the love and support that Jenn had. So cool too that you and Talana met. I can't wait to see pics.

    Jenn's comment to you really brought tears to my eyes. I guess we just never know.

    Hugs to you!!!

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  4. That must have been very intense! I would have been bawling big time the whole time, I'm sure.

    How special that you and Talana got to meet and meet Jenn's family.

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  5. Amy, I'm really glad you got to go. I'm sure you gave our best from everyone on the site. Jenn will certainly be missed...

    laura

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  6. Hey, maybe you can cross off your #92 from your list of things to do? You've done very well so far in that regard! :)

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  7. I wish I could have gone too. Thanks for showing all of our love for Jenn.

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  8. Hey Amy! I'm so sad to hear of another life lost to CF. I'm glad you were able to go to the funeral. Reading your blog brought back a lot of the emotions I felt when we lost Tanya. We are coming close to the one year anniversary, but it still doesn't feel like she is gone. But the reality that I can't email, call, hug or see her sets in and I grieve all over again.

    Thank you for all your blogs. It helps me feel connected to the CF world still.

    **HUG**

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